Not much on my mind this week. As usual, all I know is what I read in the papers, and that hasn’t been very exciting lately. When that happens, what can I do but read the business section. People actually lined up outside stores early in the morning last Friday for the thrill of being among the first to plunk down $129 for Apple’s new operating system which, in Apple’s inimitable way of making computers look and sound like fun toys, is called "Tiger." So does everyone who uses an Apple lust after Tiger? Do they have a choice?

Before trying to answer those questions, we might as well drag the other big dog into the kennel. You’ll have to wait until late next year to stand in line for the long and anxiously awaited "Longhorn" edition of Windows, but the same questions apply.

I’m not going to talk tech here. I barely know what an operating system is, but I know it’s the primary thing you have to learn to make your computer work for you, and I’m real comfortable with mine even if it’s not the latest model. If you line up on the sidewalk in the wee hours to get the latest model, your computer isn’t working for you; you’re working for it. I’m sure Tiger and Longhorn are perfectly good systems, just as I’m sure that your brand new F150 is a fine truck, but my old truck still does everything a pickup is supposed to do, and I’m just as comfortable with my old truck as I am with my old operating system.

Car analogies work from the manufacturer’s perspective, too. Car manufacturers put out a new model of everything every year, whether they need one or not. Sure, they brag about all the new features and the great looking new body style but the only real reason they do it is to sell more cars. They spend oceans of money on advertising to persuade you that your image, both public and self, depends on getting a new car, and you’ll never get a better deal than right now. Apple and Microsoft are performing a variation of the same dance. In some ways, they have to dance even better. Cars wear out. The manufacturers make sure of that, but theoretically, the zeros and ones on that plastic disk will outlive all of us. When some electronic vandal crashes your system–not if, when–you just kill the bug and reload. It only takes a couple of days, if you know what you’re doing.

That brings us to one of the things Apple and Microsoft use to bait the hook. Car manufacturers use it too–speed. You have to have the new model because it goes faster. Both your car and your computer will go a lot faster than you really need to go. The other reason you might want a new car and/or a new operating system is the bells and whistles. I know the new Windows will do a lot of stuff my old Windows won’t do, so maybe I’ll call you, Bill, when I actually want to do one of those things. Actually, Steve and Bill have gone easy on us, so far. If they wanted to really grab us by the huevos, they’d put out new stuff every year that doesn’t communicate with the old stuff at all. You can’t put a BMW motor in your Yugo without a lot of professional help. Steve and Bill are trying their best to keep it simple, but increasingly, what passes for simple in their minds is just a bunch of zeros and ones to those of us who have some work to do other than processing the data.

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One more item from those business pages. An AM radio station in San Francisco, KYCY at 1550, has dumped its format of syndicated talk shows and commenced what it calls a "podcast" format. The station plans to get all of its programming from the listeners off the Internet, and in addition to broadcasting on the AM frequency, it will stream this programming through its website. I understand that stuff only in the most general terms, but what interests me is the idea of broadcasting programming produced by the listeners and ONLY programming produced by the listeners. That’s a whole new definition of "community radio." KYCY’s recent ratings have been so low they don’t even register on Arbitron, so they have nothing to lose by trying something new, but I wouldn’t want to be on their advertising sales team right now.

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Didn’t we just say last week that the governor’s remark about closing the borders might not have been an accident? In the past week he’s shifted his Hummer into full-speed border patrol hysteria. First, he made what sounded like a cold call to a local call-in program on an LA radio station to complain about a billboard put up by a Spanish language TV station. It says "Los Angeles, Mexico," and "Tu ciudad, tu equipo," your city, your team. Arnold says it promotes illegal immigration. Then he gave an unqualified endorsement to the Minutemen, that bunch of guys without real jobs who have been patroling the border in Arizona with rifles hoping to pick off a Mexican or two, no questions asked. Schwartzy says he’d welcome them in California. This is real lunatic fringe stuff.

Fanning the flames about illegal immigration worked for Pete Wilson 11 years ago, but I’m guessing Arnold’s gung ho approach to it will fall flat. First, the attitude among Anglos probably has softened a bit over those years. I mean with all those big shot politicians hiring illegals as nannies and gardeners, maybe it’s not such a bad deal. More important, roughly half the voters in the state are Hispanic. Not to say that all Hispanics are for illegal immigration, but they recognize it as a symbolic issue with an undercurrent of anti-Hispanic rhetoric.

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